Nursing Home or One Flew Over The Coo Coo's Nest? Edit Blog Entry

10-05-2011 at 10:38 AM 

OMG!!!!! I have never!!!! Never been to a nursing home, at night, in the wing where all of the Alzheimer's residents live. Sundowners is a range of behaviors—something that is not usual for the person. That can range from just being restless to striking out and statistically occurs during the transition between daylight and darkness. Now imagine being around 10 people who are all having a sundowners episode AT THE SAME TIME!

Yesterday evening we moved my grandmother into a nursing home. She just turned 92 years old and suffers from dementia. She was put in a secured wing because she often says she wants to go home and once actually got in the elevator, at her previous retirement home, and walked out the front door. She doesn't drive anymore but was willing to take a cab to get to her house. A house she sold years before. We felt helpless because there was no reasoning with her. She required additional medical care and she was not receiving it at the retirement home. We had no choice but to put her needs first and put her in a facility where she can receive the care she requires.

As I walked into the wing to visit my grandmother after living there for a short 4 hours I first saw my grandmother being wheeled down a hallway by an elder lady wearing a dress. I didn't know who she was until an aid stopped her, took her by the hands, and walked her back to her room as if she was just learning how to walk. I realized the elder lady was not an employee when I heard the nurse tell her, " Now come with me. You shouldn't be doing this. Let's go back to your room now." The case of the runaway Alzheimer's patient going nowhere fast. Then, I walked into my grandmothers room and saw an aid helping an elderly woman, who was sitting in a chair, helping her up. She said, "your in the wrong room sweetie. Let's go back to your room now."

This was followed by my grandmother getting agitated and wanting to "go home". As we tried to calm her we suddenly heard yelling from the hallway. It seemed there was a woman having a very bad case of sundowners. She was cussing at the staff telling them to get the %^%&%% out of her room. And, to leave her the %^%%$ alone. OMG. I couldn't protect my grandmother from hearing this, her first day there, I couldn't blame her for wanting to "go home". Then, I stepped into the hallway and saw a lady standing at the door with a wheelchair she was rolling down the hallway. I asked her if she was my grandmothers' room mate. She giggled at me. I asked her again. Again, she giggled at me. Shortly after this my grandmothers' room mate finally showed up. She was brought to the room not knowing where her room was. Once she got into the room we introduce my grandmother and the room mate. We thought maybe having someone to talk to would be a distraction from where she was. Until the room mate started to act " funny". She kept going in and out of the bathroom, chanting, and stating she didn't know what to do and needed help. Of course I went looking for help for her and told her someone would be in to help her shortly. In the meantime my grandmother is very upset and agitated continuously stating she wants to leave and doesn't know why she is there. "I am sorry I came here", she said and then she looked at my mother and said, "what did you do to me". These were the last words my mother needed to hear, the eldest of her siblings, and the one continuous caretaker in my grandmothers life. The room mate continued to act "funny" as someone who doesn't remember anything. Whenever I asked her a question she told me that, "I don't remember anything. I am confused". Then, as the room mate kept making statements and chanting my grandmother looks up and points to her and says, "I gotta live with this?" Everyone in the room including my grandmother broke out in laughter including the nurses aid who had to leave the room to contain herself. It was a good break and nice to see my grandmother smile and laugh even if it was for a few minutes. But, it didn't last all night. My grandmother still insisted she wanted to "go home". My mother and I could not bare to see her in distress and feel helpless so we left. Her aggression continued resulting in her falling from her attempt to get up even though she is still able to walk with the help of a walker.

As we were leaving the home we heard residents all the way down the hallway calling out from their rooms, asking for help, not knowing where they were, what they were supposed to do. It was sad and disturbing to see and hear. It was something that had to happen. A place that we have to depend on and trust to take good care of our loved one.


Today is a new day. I am looking forward to seeing how the same people I encountered the night before act during the afternoon hours. I hope to see my grandmother engaged in activities with a smile on her face.